Ram Gopal Varma and Me

In my last post I mentioned that I’ll be writing about Ramgopal Varma, who’s been writing unpleasant things about me on his blog. So here it goes.

I have been attached to him. After watching me in Bandit Queen and Tamanna, he offered me Satya and also a small role in Daud, after that. We have had a good professional relationship. However, I won’t be able to comment much on the creative aspects, since it was mostly Anurag Kashyap or Saurabh Shukla, I interacted with.

Mr. Ramgopal Varma, on his blog said that when in award ceremonies, people called me Bheekhu Mhatre (my character’s name in Satya), I used to get excited as they called me and not the other stars. Actually, this has been the only reason of tension between us. He has spent his entire life on false beliefs.

I was happy with the success of Satya and was glad that I at least got a chance to stand. I was happy that I had an abode. Hence, in spite of all the prevailing apprehensions between us, I was thankful to him. A passion to become an actor drove me to Mumbai. I had dreams to become successful and lead a good life with my family. I never wanted to compete and I think that I achieved more than I had ever dreamt of.

The problem with Mr. Ramgopal Varma has been that he always wanted Manoj Bajpayee as an actor who can flatter him all the time. He wanted someone who has no self respect. I just want to say that please Mr Verma stop maligning my character. Our creative and professional ventures are over now. And there’s no question of an emotional attachment, because it never existed on the first hand. So, Mr.Varma, if you feel too much for me, you better keep my photograph and look at it every morning. But stop faking.

However, I know that you wouldn’t leave me; else your own existence would be in danger. All I want to say is that no one expected Satya’s success. We did what we could to the best of our abilities. As an actor, I performed my best and as a director you did what you thought was the best.

No one owes anything to each other now, but I’m still grateful to you. However, you should learn to respect my feelings and emotions too. But who am I saying all this to? To a person who doesn’t believe in any form of relationship, may it be that of a husband and a wife or that of a brother and a sister, or any other form of emotional bond, for that matter.

Since last nine years I have been trying to make things work out between us. Professionally, there was never much of an economic gain from you. And you more denied me after casting than you ever gave me roles, but I’m still thankful for what I got from you. May God bless you and keep you happy.

I always wanted to share this with you people. There’s more to all this, which is likely to come up if Mr Varma refuse to mend his ways. I respect him, but that doesn’t mean I’m a menial worker who would do whatever he asks for.

It feels better now.

Love
Yours

Manoj Bajpayee